Why do people drift apart?
Men are like Black and White Smartphones with a limited talk time.
So, compared to Women (who see the World in bright vivid colors and all in High Definition), Men see the World in plain old Black and White. This is also how they process emotions.
Seeing the World in Black and White, simply means that Men just overlook anything that either doesn’t stand out like a sore thumb or doesn’t contribute to their agenda for the day.
And “processing” emotions at a Black and White level means that Men only process emotions and feelings that carry a high level of intensity.
But,those emotions they feel at a MUCH deeper level. Also, the emotions they process are limited to their inherent job description, which is to Provide, Protect, and Procreate.
Now, the “limited talk time”issue, is a result of a Man’s speech part of the brain, called the Broca Area, being in a state of hibernation most of the time. That’s why most Men need some “alcohol” to have those longer conversations and often times at the expense of their lives.
So, do these “deficiencies” serve a purpose?
Being able to filter out vivid details and emotions meant that Men wouldn’t have to think twice about busting the jaws of every Big Bad Wolf that turned up uninvited at their doorstep. And, they didn’t get distracted by every “Traveling Cat circus” that arrived in their Prehistoric Town, when they were out in the Wilderness, shopping for “live food”,
And their biological “talking” deficiency, meant that they didn’t get an urge to phone their Wives with a quick update, when they were busy running for their lives, from the Cheetah who didn’t seem to approve of their fashion sense.
But, despite the occasional inconvenience of maybe getting one or two Family Members gobbled up by a passerby Python,life was as sweet as clementines UNTIL..lamps and light bulbs showed up.
Now, don’t get me wrong. I love my electricity. In fact, I don’t particularly enjoy walking around in the dark. Nor do I enjoy the slightly unpleasant sensation of bumping into stuff.
But, the emergence of the incandescent light bulb did is shine a bright light on the above-mentioned deficiencies,that Men had successfully kept under wraps for Millions of years.
Now Men couldn’t just walk into their caves, sit down on the coziest rock they could find(the equivalent to the modern day sofa) and recharge away as they used to.
Sure. Many Guys still do that,but only because they assume that Women are just as happy and blissed out as they are when they’re being “quiet”. Besides, she too may be trying to recuperate any charge that she may have lost through that dreaded activity called“conversation”. So “punishing her”with more of the same would be almost criminal. Sadly, what he don’t realize is that NOT talking to her (along with a list of other things) is the very reason why she has a wide range of custom made frying pans that’s roughly the same shape and size of his head.
So, whilst Men are still head over heels about that old fashioned Lady with amazing Virtues, a glowing smile,fewer frying pans and an extra bit of the oomph factor, Women have a completely different set of requirements.
They now expect Men to:
1. TALK about their feeling (yikes!)
2. Talk about their day and anything that’s bothering them (double yikes!)
3. Listen without FIXING
4. Call her several times during the day with a “weather update”
5. Pay her a sincere compliment or ten every day
6. Take time to notice and appreciate anything she’s done around the house and in her appearance
7. Surprise her with little gifts, cards and notes expressing how much she means to him
8. Fix stuff around the house before they even think about breaking
9. Make her feel super cozy and comfortable at all times
10. Plan a weekend getaway to some extravagant romantic setting that she “briefly”mentioned in a conversation
11. At least once a week: take out on a Romantic Dinner somewhere mystical, go for a walk by the Beach with her, row across a picturesque lake with her, book front row seats to her favorite musical or orchestra symphony etc.
12. Open the Car door/front door for her
13. Pull out the chair for her to sit at a restaurant (and push it back after preferably before she sits back down)
14. Always be cheerful and awesome to be around
15. Be ambitious
16. Be spontaneous (show up at home dressed as a hunky Fireman or Police Officer)
17. Be well groomed and dressed at ALL times (even when at home)
18. Take charge by planning out their dates, getaways, special occasions etc (in a manner favorable to her)
19. Maintain a high degree of standards at all times (clean nails, good manners, well-polished shoes, perky hair etc)
20. Be helpful around the house (take out the trash, do the dishes, tell the Cat a bedtime story, take the dog out for a walk etc)
21. Pay for EVERYTHING with sheer delight
22. Buy her flowers (ideally every day) – a Single flower is just as effective as Women score their points based on the frequency of the deed and not the volume
23. Make her a fresh coffee each morning and occasionally surprise her with Breakfast in bed
24. Eat healthy, workout regularly and be in the best shape possible
25. Go nuts on a punching bag once in a while, just to let her know that he’s the real deal
26. Moisturize daily (from head to toe)
27. Do ALL the heavy lifting around the house (without having to be asked)
28. But MOST importantly shows up dressed up as a Vampire on Halloween
When both Men and Women make the effort to meet each other’s “strange needs”, we have a Love Boat that doesn’t sink every time it bumps into a tiny little iceberg.
