Our Regulatory Manager sure does things in strange ways.
But what he expects from us, more than anything else is that we’re kind, helpful, generous, considerate, courteous and forgiving to every single Human, Koala, and Extraterrestrial that we come across and that we walk the Earth, emanating a fragrant sense of gratitude (much like one of those plugin air fresheners). And contrary to popular belief, he really doesn’t care about what your race,religion or preferred football team is. If you play by his rules, you will not only have the Creator of the Universe behind you, but you’ll also have the backing of all his Supernatural Special Agents around the clock.
But if you wanna kick up your Supernatural Blessings by several notches, then you may wanna consider becoming a member of the Supernatural VIP Club. And you can do that by:
1. Donating 10% of your net earnings each month to a cause that genuinely helps people who cannot help themselves. My preference is Orphanages and charities like the Make-a-wish foundation. So, giving socks to homeless kittens doesn’t count.
I like to refer to this 10% as paying your Supernatural taxes because it opens up the door to countless possibilities and blessings in a way that you cannot even fathom.
Think of it like this. Paying your taxes on times gives you the privilege of continuing to enjoy the freedom, the security, the health benefits and all the good stuff that life has to offer. And not paying your taxes on time, not only lands you in a whole lot of ickiness, but you may not also like the accommodation, medical facilities, security measures, meal options and the hairstyles that the authorities arrange forcibly arrange on your behalf.
2. When good things happen (however small they may be), just say “Thank you” (under your breath or out loud). And when bad things happen, thank the Regulatory Manager in advance for working behind the scenes to resolve your situation or for somehow using it to mold you into shape in order take you to the next level.
3. Make the Regulatory Manager a part of your daily life. So when you go out shopping, ask him to help you find what you need and when you need a parking space, ask him to help you with that etc.
4. Take a few minutes every day to thank him for all the Wonderful things he’s done in your life. It can be as simple as being thankful for your arms, legs, eyesight, teeth and hearing and for putting a roof over your head (that doesn’t leak every fortnight). Gratitude breaks away the cobwebs on your Supernatural two-way radio, allowing you to have a better connection with your Creator.
5. Whenever you need something, however, impossible it may seem, just ASK. Maybe you’re hoping to overcome an insurmountable financial situation.
Maybe your health decided to whoop you in the ass one morning and left your Doctors scratching their heads. Or maybe your relationships took a turn for the worse.
Think of the asking process like opening a support ticket at the Supernatural Help Desk. If you mark the support ticket as urgent (or potentially life threatening), and the folks at the other end agree with that classification, your request will get processed within seconds.
For instance, if you’re about to get crushed by an Elephant that fell out of a Chopper flying overhead, then your cry for help may sound as brief as “Eek!”. But within seconds you’ll experience a gust of wind or a hand pulling you away to safety.
Sometimes you get the help even without having to ask for help as a result of paying your Supernatural Taxes on time each month.
And then there are the non-urgent tickets that don’t get processed right away or just get “mysteriously deleted”. If a ticket gets rejected several times, perhaps it’s something that’s likely to hinder your progress or march toward your destiny in some way.
For instance, if you ask for a massage chair for you to sit on straight after your Shower, your Creator may reject that request based on the potential risk of “being toasted to absolute crispiness and not being able to see daylight again”. And given that he has the ability to see how each scenario plays out using his “future projection playback facility with 7.1 Dolby Surround Sound”, doing things our way might not be such a good idea.
And then there are the tickets that get delayed long enough for the other pieces of the puzzle to fall into place. It’s a bit like not being able to pull out a checkmate on your first move in a game of chess. If you could, the game may not be as exciting.
A delay can be a result of someone else’s support ticket somehow coinciding with yours. So, in order for your ticket to get resolved, you would first have to help the person that your Creator sends your way.
When you do experience a delay for whatever reason, don’t be disheartened and stop believing or stop asking because that you would actually be the equivalent of “deleting” that support ticket altogether.
6. Listen to your heart (not the thumping sound but listen to what it’s trying to tell you) –
If you don’t feel too good about a Business opportunity you’re about to invest in or feel queasy about a purchase you’re about to make, give it a miss altogether. Likewise, if you don’t see the names of your unborn children written on the forehead of that person you just met, perhaps you pull the handbrakes for a while and do a little soul searching first.
The “gut feeling” receptor that was wired into you at the manufacturing plant, is really your Creator’s first line of communication. He only resorts to using other means of communication (such as nature, technology, other people etc) afterward.
Do the above steps faithfully and consistently for at least a year and you’ll see a dramatic shift in your life, for the better. And don’t worry about slipping up from time to time, because we all stumble from time to time, especially when we’re trying out something new. So, think of it like learning to fly for the first time (with just your arms and legs).
Why a whole year? Your Regulatory Manager is always looking for REAL Soldiers to join his Unarmed Elite Forces, because there’s just far too many wannabes out there who toss all the toys out their prams and run to their Mummies, as soon as the going gets tough.
So give it a try and stay resolutely on course! There’s really no better feeling than knowing that you have an advantage that 90% of the World population don’t enjoy because they either overlook the basic rules in the game of life or give up far too soon. Besides, it’s such a small price to pay to witness firsthand what your Creator’s really capable of.
